Quick Tips for Building Your Child’s Self-Esteem

Self-esteem​ ​plays​ ​a​ ​very​ ​important​ ​role​ ​in​ ​establishing​ ​a​ ​successful​ ​and​ ​happy​ ​life.​ ​A person​ ​can​ ​be​ ​blessed​ ​with​ ​intelligence​ ​and​ ​talent​ ​but​ ​the​ ​lack​ ​of​ ​self-esteem​ ​can​ ​be​ ​a hindrance​ ​in​ ​doing​ ​well​ ​in​ ​just​ ​about​ ​anything.

It​ ​has​ ​been​ ​proven​ ​that​ ​the​ ​early​ ​years​ ​of​ ​a​ ​child​ ​life​ ​is​ ​when​ ​they​ ​are​ ​most impressionable,​ ​they​ ​notice​ ​and​ ​copy​ ​everything​ ​they​ ​see​ ​or​ ​hear.​ ​​​Parents​ ​should​ ​then take​ ​advantage​ ​of​ ​this​ ​by​ ​ensuring​ ​that​ ​the​ ​child​ ​learns​ ​all​ ​the​ ​necessary​ ​social​ ​skills they​ ​need​ ​to​ ​be​ ​well-rounded​ ​individuals.​ ​​​At​ ​the​ ​same​ ​time,​ ​building​ ​their​ ​self-esteem this​ ​early​ ​will​ ​ensure​ ​this.

Here​ ​are​ ​quick​ ​tips​ ​on​ ​how​ ​to​ ​nurture​ ​young​ ​children’s​ ​self-esteem:

Show​ ​love​ ​and​ ​affection​.​ ​We​ ​all​ ​love​ ​our​ ​children,​ ​no​ ​doubt.​ ​​​Sometimes​ ​though​ ​we forget​ ​to​ ​show​ ​how​ ​much​ ​we​ ​love​ ​them.​ ​​​This​ ​is​ ​necessary​ ​as​ ​it​ ​reassures​ ​them​ ​that they​ ​are​ ​important​ ​and​ ​very​ ​much​ ​appreciated.

Compliment​ ​them​.​ ​Don’t​ ​forget​ ​to​ ​acknowledge​ ​their​ ​every​ ​accomplishment,​ ​no​ ​matter how​ ​small.​ ​​​Simple​ ​compliments​ ​like​ ​“You​ ​did​ ​great,”​ ​“I​ ​am​ ​so​ ​proud​ ​of​ ​you”​ ​or​ ​even “That​ ​was​ ​a​ ​good​ ​try”​ ​will​ ​go​ ​a​ ​long​ ​way​ ​in​ ​a​ ​young​ ​child’s​ ​mind​ ​and​ ​will​ ​help​ ​build​ ​up their​ ​self-esteem.​ ​​​Make​ ​sure​ ​though​ ​that​ ​each​ ​compliment​ ​is​ ​convincing​ ​and​ ​not​ ​over the​ ​top​ ​like​ ​“You​ ​are​ ​the​ ​smartest​ ​little​ ​boy​ ​in​ ​the​ ​whole​ ​world”​ ​as​ ​this​ ​can​ ​result​ ​in​ ​an inflated​ ​ego.​ ​​​Instead,​ ​you​ ​can​ ​say.​ ​“You​ ​are​ ​the​ ​smartest​ ​8-year-old​ ​boy​ ​I​ ​know.”

Set​ ​goals​ ​for​ ​your​ ​child​.​ ​One​ ​way​ ​parents​ ​teach​ ​young​ ​children​ ​to​ ​be​ ​independent​ ​is by​ ​making​ ​them​ ​follow​ ​a​ ​simple​ ​chore​ ​chart​ ​this​ ​can​ ​be​ ​the​ ​start​ ​of​ ​goal​ ​setting​ ​as​ ​well. It​ ​usually​ ​consists​ ​of​ ​attainable,​ ​age​ ​appropriate​ ​daily​ ​activities​ ​like​ ​fixing​ ​the​ ​bed, brushing​ ​their​ ​teeth​ ​after​ ​meals​ ​and​ ​packing​ ​away​ ​after​ ​playing.​ ​​​When​ ​the​ ​children​ ​are able​ ​to​ ​complete​ ​their​ ​task​ ​and​ ​realize​ ​that​ ​they​ ​were​ ​able​ ​to​ ​achieve​ ​their​ ​goal,​ ​they feel​ ​good​ ​about​ ​themselves.​ ​​​When​ ​they​ ​hear​ ​you​ ​compliment​ ​them​ ​and​ ​see​ ​how​ ​proud you​ ​are​ ​of​ ​them,​ ​it​ ​strengthens​ ​their​ ​self-esteem.​ ​​​Slowly​ ​incorporate​ ​new​ ​and​ ​harder things​ ​to​ ​their​ ​goals​ ​after​ ​a​ ​certain​ ​period,​ ​and​ ​this​ ​will​ ​help​ ​them​ ​believe​ ​that​ ​they​ ​can take​ ​on​ ​bigger​ ​responsibilities​ ​as​ ​long​ ​as​ ​they​ ​set​ ​their​ ​minds​ ​to​ ​it.

Criticize​ ​the​ ​action,​ ​not​ ​the​ ​person​.​ ​We​ ​must​ ​be​ ​conscious​ ​of​ ​what​ ​we​ ​say​ ​to​ ​children as​ ​they​ ​always​ ​take​ ​it​ ​to​ ​heart.​ ​​​While​ ​we​ ​still​ ​have​ ​to​ ​reprimand​ ​them​ ​for​ ​doing​ ​or saying​ ​things​ ​they​ ​are​ ​not​ ​supposed​ ​to,​ ​we​ ​must​ ​choose​ ​the​ ​words​ ​we​ ​use​ ​carefully​ ​so that​ ​they​ ​understand​ ​that​ ​they​ ​did​ ​something​ ​wrong​ ​without​ ​hurting​ ​them​ ​unnecessarily.

Instead​ ​of​ ​saying,​ ​“You​ ​were​ ​a​ ​bad​ ​boy”​ ​try​ ​saying​ ​“That​ ​was​ ​not​ ​a​ ​very​ ​nice​ ​thing​ ​to​ ​do, I​ ​know​ ​you​ ​didn’t​ ​mean​ ​it,​ ​so​ ​I​ ​hope​ ​you​ ​don’t​ ​do​ ​it​ ​again.”

Validate​ ​your​ ​child’s​ ​feelings​.​ ​They​ ​will​ ​experience​ ​suffering​ ​a​ ​blow​ ​to​ ​their self-esteem​ ​at​ ​least​ ​once,​ ​and​ ​there​ ​really​ ​isn’t​ ​anything​ ​we​ ​can​ ​do​ ​to​ ​stop​ ​that.​ ​​​What we​ ​can​ ​do,​ ​however,​ ​is​ ​to​ ​validate​ ​their​ ​feelings​ ​and​ ​make​ ​sure​ ​they​ ​recover​ ​from​ ​the blow/s.​ ​Talk​ ​to​ ​them​ ​and​ ​let​ ​them​ ​know​ ​that​ ​you​ ​understand​ ​that​ ​“what​ ​your​ ​classmate said​ ​was​ ​not​ ​nice​ ​and​ ​it​ ​hurt​ ​your​ ​feelings​ ​a​ ​lot”​ ​or​ ​“it​ ​hurts​ ​to​ ​know​ ​that​ ​not​ ​everyone wants​ ​to​ ​be​ ​your​ ​friend.”​ ​​​Then​ ​explain​ ​to​ ​them​ ​that​ ​it​ ​may​ ​be​ ​possible​ ​that​ ​the classmate​ ​only​ ​said​ ​those​ ​things​ ​out​ ​of​ ​frustration​ ​and​ ​without​ ​thinking​ ​or​ ​point​ ​out​ ​that though​ ​we​ ​cannot​ ​please​ ​everybody,​ ​there​ ​are​ ​a​ ​lot​ ​of​ ​other​ ​people​ ​who​ ​like​ ​him​ ​and are​ ​happy​ ​to​ ​be​ ​his​ ​friends.

Be​ ​proud​ ​of​ ​your​ ​child​.​ ​Always​ ​take​ ​time​ ​to​ ​remind​ ​them​ ​of​ ​how​ ​proud​ ​you​ ​are​ ​of them.​ ​​​Their​ ​accomplishments​ ​may​ ​seem​ ​small​ ​at​ ​times,​ ​but​ ​we​ ​must​ ​not​ ​forget​ ​that they​ ​are​ ​children​ ​and​ ​these​ ​are​ ​big​ ​ones​ ​for​ ​them.​ ​​​Let​ ​them​ ​hear​ ​you​ ​talk​ ​about​ ​how much​ ​you​ ​love​ ​them​ ​and​ ​how​ ​proud​ ​you​ ​are​ ​of​ ​their​ ​achievements​ ​in​ ​front​ ​of​ ​their teachers​ ​and​ ​friends​ ​or​ ​other​ ​people​ ​they​ ​love.

Never​ ​to​ ​compare​.​ ​​​This​ ​is​ ​a​ ​common​ ​mistake​ ​for​ ​a​ ​lot​ ​of​ ​parents​ ​as​ ​it​ ​is​ ​really​ ​easy​ ​to fall​ ​into,​ ​but​ ​we​ ​must​ ​not​ ​compare​ ​our​ ​children​ ​to​ ​each​ ​other​ ​or​ ​their​ ​friends.​ ​​​It​ ​is​ ​not fair,​ ​and​ ​it​ ​isn’t​ ​something​ ​we​ ​like​ ​done​ ​to​ ​ourselves​ ​as​ ​well.​ ​When​ ​a​ ​comparison​ ​has been​ ​carelessly​ ​made​ ​by​ ​others,​ ​reassure​ ​our​ ​children​ ​that​ ​there​ ​are​ ​other​ ​things​ ​that though​ ​others​ ​may​ ​be​ ​better​ ​than​ ​them​ ​at​ ​some​ ​things,​ ​there​ ​are​ ​definitely​ ​other​ ​things that​ ​excel​ ​in​ ​and​ ​make​ ​them​ ​special​ ​and​ ​unique.​ ​Try​ ​to​ ​explain​ ​why​ ​the​ ​comparison​ ​was made​ ​and​ ​why​ ​it​ ​should​ ​not​ ​make​ ​them​ ​feel​ ​bad​ ​about​ ​themselves.

It​ ​takes​ ​a​ ​village​.​ ​For​ ​anything​ ​to​ ​fully​ ​develop,​ ​there​ ​has​ ​to​ ​be​ ​consistency.​ ​​​These positive​ ​reinforcements​ ​cannot​ ​only​ ​be​ ​learned​ ​or​ ​practiced​ ​at​ ​home;​ ​it​ ​should​ ​be carried​ ​out​ ​wherever​ ​they​ ​go.​ ​​​Enlist​ ​the​ ​help​ ​of​ ​those​ ​who​ ​spend​ ​time​ ​with​ ​your​ ​children on​ ​a​ ​regular​ ​basis.​ ​Let​ ​grandpa​ ​and​ ​grandma,​ ​their​ ​aunts​ ​and​ ​uncles,​ ​the​ ​babysitter, and​ ​their​ ​teachers​ ​know​ ​how​ ​of​ ​your​ ​children’s​ ​strengths​ ​and​ ​how​ ​you​ ​are​ ​nurturing them.​ ​Inform​ ​them​ ​of​ ​the​ ​do’s​ ​and​ ​don’ts​ ​so​ ​that​ ​they​ ​can​ ​apply​ ​these​ ​as​ ​well.

Tend​ ​to​ ​your​ ​own​ ​self-esteem​.​ ​Be​ ​a​ ​good​ ​example​ ​as​ ​you​ ​are​ ​the​ ​ones​ ​your​ ​children look​ ​up​ ​to​ ​the​ ​most.​ ​Make​ ​sure​ ​that​ ​your​ ​children​ ​know​ ​that​ ​you​ ​are​ ​a​ ​happy,​ ​positive individual.​ ​Show​ ​them​ ​that​ ​you​ ​value​ ​yourself​ ​and​ ​that​ ​you​ ​are​ ​constantly​ ​working​ ​on improving​ ​yourself​ ​to​ ​become​ ​a​ ​better​ ​person.